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Tending To A Broken Heart? Here's How You Can Sail Through This Break-Up Smoothly!

By Somdutta Mazumder

Updated - Jan. 21, 2020 7 min read

The arrival of a new romance always marks the beginning of a beautiful time period, replete with new promises, exciting future prospects and the company of a new partner in crime! 


But like all good things, strong relationships you thought would last a lifetime, are sometimes met with despairing endings. You believed in love, and you took a leap of faith, but sadly as luck would have it, the relationship you invested in did not work out the way you wanted it to. Now what? 


Image Courtesy - Pexels 


Now is when you initiate the process of healing. If you've recently experienced a heart-wrenching breakup, and are struggling to go back to your old, usual self, we are here to tell you that it gets easier. But that is only the case if you devote sufficient time and genuine effort into moving on, letting go and starting anew. 


How? Well, to make this difficult experience, a tad easier, we have compiled a list of things you can do to recover from a break-up. 


Cut Off All Contact Albeit Temporarily And Establish Boundaries

First things first, the notion of magically becoming best friends with your ex immediately after your relationship ends, is far-fetched and misleading. After spending a prolonged period of time being romantically involved with someone, it is very necessary to take a step back when the situation so demands. And a breakup is definitely such a situation wherein healthy processing requires you to cut off ties, albeit on a temporary basis. 


Image Courtesy - Giphy



Delete All Memorabilia Of The Relationship 

As tempting as it is to look at the selfie from your first date, for the billionth time in a day, all its leading to is heartbreak, misery and zero productivity. Yes, when a significant relationship in your life comes to an end, the urge to revisit the best memories and reminisce is stronger than ever. But this when you need to practice self-restraint and delete all memorabilia of your past relationship from your frequented devices. Trust us, those constant reminders will hinder your progress more than you'll realise. 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Occupy Yourself With Productive Activities 

Speaking of holding yourself back from engaging in unproductive activities like constantly glancing at pictures of your ex, the best way to get rid of a habit is to replace it with a better one! If you've been ignoring all those piling work e-mails to binge-watch The Notebook instead, now is the time to gather yourself and start getting stuff done! Being productive will be rewarding in itself, and the sense of accomplishment you'll be left with will seriously reduce those post-breakup blues! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Indulge In Hobbies You Enjoy But Never Have The Time For 

Remember when picking up a guitar was stimulating enough to get your heart racing? Or when the prospect of starting a new book made you feel all giddy inside? When we are deeply involved in a romantic relationship, in the process of nurturing love, we tend to turn a blind eye to all the little things that are uniquely ours! If there are some hobbies that you always enjoyed but got no time for in the course of your past relationship, now is the perfect opportunity to engage yourself with your favourite things to do! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Stop Blaming Yourself And Treat Yourself With Kindness 

Okay, first of all, your relationship wouldn't have lasted if you had "just given him more time". Second of all, any relationship whether romantic or otherwise is always a two way street with two individuals partaking. So as sad as the demise of your relationship might be, it is also the product of the choices of both you and your ex! Also, the break-up of a long and important relationship can be immensely traumatic, so right now you deserve all the kindness you can get, including yours! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Get Some Natural Dopamine 

Yes, the thought of calling in sick at work, and lying on the couch while stuffing your face with potato chips is extremely appealing right now, but trust us when we say this, your body hasn't needed you any more than it does now! The psychological pain and stress from your break-up can have an impact on the production of chemicals in your brain, leading to low mood and energy. Hack? Grab those running shoes and get your body some natural dopamine high! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy



Go For A Digital Detox 

If you've been planning on temporarily de-activating your social media accounts, this time is as opportune as it gets! While browsing through social media can be mind-numbingly entertaining, it is also counter-productive when you're trying to heal! The portal opened by your Instagram account to the happening lives of photogenic strangers needs to be shut every now and then, and the post-breakup period is the perfect time to avoid all those #relationshipgoals pictures! Bonus? A digital detox will also ensure you don't spend hours manically stalking your now ex! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy 


Establish Actionable Short-Term And Long-Term Goals 

If there was one person you thought would be around for the long haul, it was your ex-partner. And now they're gone. So feeling lost is nothing but a natural human response to sudden heavy change. That being said, you need to remind yourself who the chief protagonist in your life is! Grab a piece of paper, and start listing out the things you want to do and achieve in the coming time. Clearly defined short-term and long-term goals will allow you to organise your thoughts and actions, as well as give you a bigger perspective, right when you need it the most. 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Vent It All Out But With A Timer 

Bottling up the frustration, anger and hurt is only going to come back to haunt you later when it all explodes without warning! The first step to psychological healing is not burying all your negative emotions and putting a brave face on, but instead finding an outlet to release them! Whether you want to scream, cry or rant to your friend, allow yourself to experience the feelings that are bubbling inside of you. However, in order not to dwell them, set a timer for this venting process and then just let it all go! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Invest In The People In Your Life That Matter 

Yes, you've recently lost a person you thought would stay by your side forever. But that shouldn't cloud the existence of all the other equally if not more, important people in your life! In the face of a heart-wrenching break-up, talking to and spending time with your friends, parents, siblings and other loved ones can be significantly helpful. If nothing else, they will remind you that you're loved by several other people, who won't wake up one day and break-up with you! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy 


Catch Up On All The Lost Sleep And Lazy Sessions 

Investing in and maintaining a romantic relationship is quite a task, that sometimes demands serious efforts and time. Lucky for you, there is no need for that in your life anymore! You no longer have to rush to dinner reservations after work, or spend hours helping your ex-partner shop! Now, you have the freedom to switch off your phone, curl up on the couch and hibernate for as long as you want, without an angry person waiting on the phone line! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy 



Call Your Mom 

If you are living alone and away from your family, dealing with an unexpected and painful break-up can be even more challenging than it already is! Well luckily for us, telephones and video calls exist in the 21st century! Give your mom that lengthy phone call you've been putting off for a while, and spend the duration talking your heart out! Not only will you feel lighter, mothers also have this inherent ability to just make everything feel alright! Also, your mom will be grateful for you choosing her to confide in and talk to! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy 


Call Your Dad

When all else fails, just give your dad a call. If nothing else, his taunts will be enough to make you drop everything and focus on getting your life back on track! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy

Congrats on making it to the end of this guide on recovering from a break-up! Now that your head is swarming with ideas of things to do that will help you process your painful break-up, all that's left is for you to choose yourself over your self-sabotage tendencies. Yes, moving on is difficult, lengthy and painful, but if you invest your time in small things that will help you grow as a person, you'll only emerge from this victorious! 

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