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Going The (Long) Distance - Little Things You Can Do To Keep The Spark Alive

By Somdutta Mazumder

Updated - Jan. 9, 2020 9 min read

Everybody advises us against it. "Long-distance relationships don't work" "What if he/she cheats? How will you even know?" "You'll grow apart" 


But, when the heart wants what it wants, what difference does some distance make, right? You know you're in love, you know you can't lose this person and you know you'll do anything to make this work. It just feels right, it has never felt so right. But what about those pesky kilometres, timezones and sleep cycles? 


Living away from each other can undoubtedly be daunting but what it does not have to be, is a deal-breaker. A successful long-distance relationship takes effort, patience, understanding, and the willingness to go that extra mile to make your partner happy, albeit from a distance. Wondering what romantic thing you can possibly do when you're stuck in a different city from your better half? Here's a list of ideas that will help you keep that spark alive in your long-distance relationship! 


Have Virtual Date Nights 

Just because you and your partner can no longer go to the same restaurants or have physical dinner dates, it does not inevitably mean that your date nights have to die a tragic death! Online dates on video calls are just as romantic, and the effort will convey your commitment to making your long-distance relationship work! Dress up, light a candle (or two), get your dinner plates and forget about the miles between the two of you! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy



Keep Sending Them Snaps Of Small Details Of Your Day 

Remember when you'd have a yummy burger for lunch, and you had to call your partner and tell them all about it? Or when the slightest disagreement with your mother, made you text them long paragraphs about how you want to move out? Well, the good thing is, just because you are now in a long-distance relationship, these rituals don't need to change! As you move through your day, keep sending your partner snaps of all the happy, funny, crazy or downright silly things that happen to you, and you wish to share with them! It might not seem much, but knowing they're always on your mind can thaw the coldness the distance brings! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Make A Long Distance Playlist 

Music has the ability to inspire, to uplift one's mood and bring two people together! And sometimes, when you can't string together the right words to convey exactly how you feel or how much you are missing them, the right song can do wonders! Create a special long-distance playlist comprising of songs that send forth reminders of the love you two share, and the things you've been through together! Mix it up with sad songs for when you can't stop pining for them, cheesy songs that communicate the love and affection you carry in your heart for them and happy songs for a brighter, closer together future! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Send Each Other A "When I'm Not There With You" Package

No matter how hard you are willing to try, being there for your partner continually, and on every single occasion is not practically possible even when you're in the same city, let alone a hundred miles away! So why not send them something that can be a version of you close to them, when you're occupied elsewhere? Create a "When I'm Not There With You" care package replete with handmade items, letters, small mementoes from your relationship like ticket stubs and festival bands, photos together, or whatever reminder of your love you want to furnish them with!


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Send Them A Bottle Of Your Perfume 

The sense of smell has been consistently and strongly linked with memory, perhaps more so than any of the other senses. This is a scientific fact we all know, but when you're in a long-distance relationship, you can also use this little truth of psychology to your advantage! If there is a specific perfume you wear on the regular, and your partner is familiar with, surprise them with a hand-sized bottle of it! For when the times get rough, and you can't help miss each other to death, one sniff of your perfume will be enough to keep them going! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Binge-Watch A Netflix Show Together, Virtually! 

Going long-distance does not have to put a damper on your plans to marathon through those Netflix shows together! Instead, plan a virtual binge-watch session with your partner in sickness, health and long-distance! Pick a show together, select an episode, and plan an end-of-episode discussion phone call! You can also choose to share your screens on Skype, and watch the episode by your partner's virtual side. Silver lining? Remember your partner's annoying habit of providing live commentary throughout a show/movie? Yeah, no more putting up with that! Go long-distance!  


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Send Random Texts Of Appreciation Through The Week 

A casual compliment, a reminiscent message about your favourite quirk of theirs, or a long text spelling out why you love them, random gestures of appreciation will always go a long way, regardless of the distance between the two of you! Long-distance can manage to put some space between two people, and cause them to withdraw from each other, albeit subconsciously. But just because they are out of sight does not mean you have to keep them out of your mind. Keep reminding them you love them and appreciate their existence when they least expect it and soon, you'll watch your long-distance relationship grow ten-fold in strength! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy



Go On A Virtual Vacation

Guess what? You don't need to cancel all your dream vacation plans simply because you two are not present at the same location! With the advent of technology and this thing called virtual vacation sites, going on a holiday together no longer mandatorily requires your physical presence! All you need to do is pick a country, state or city together, and venture out on a virtual trip! You can also be their tour guide, and show them around your city or hometown! Some such virtual vacation sites are Globe Genie360 Cities and Air Pano


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Play An Online Game Together 

Some mild competition can do wonders to enhance solidarity in a relationship, and that is exactly why you and your partner should consider playing an online game together! There are thousands of online games and websites you can choose from. You can either pick a two-player game, wherein you two join forces to defeat the opponent or go for a simple virtual reality game in which you compete against each other! Not a video game person? How about online Solitaire or Sudoku? 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Write Some "Open-When" Letters 

If you are living in the same city, summoning your partner as and when you need them around is not that challenging a task. But with the tag of long-distance, comes restricted availability of both the parties to take care of what the other needs at that moment. Luckily, there's a way for you to be there for your long-distance partner exactly when they need you! Write a series of "Open When" letters for different plausible scenarios your partner might be dealing with! For instance, you can write them an "open when you're missing me" letter or an "open when you want to laugh" letter or an "open when you're feeling homesick" letter!


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Work On A Bucket List For When You Start Living In The Same City 

Perhaps one of the best parts of being in a relationship is having someone to share all your plans for the future with! Your individual bucket lists suddenly fuse together to form a giant catalogue of things you want to do, places you want to visit and experiences you want to collect, together! Well, our advice? Don't let long distance get in the way of that! Start working on a bucket list you will begin to tackle the moment you guys are in the same geographical territory! Till then? Keep swooning over your dream future as the couple that survived a long-distance relationship! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Send Them Food When They least Expect It 

The way to anybody's heart (man or woman) is through their stomachs, so we urge you to make good use of this hack! If your partner just texted you about how they haven't had a meal since last night, and they are on the verge of starving to death, why not surprise them with their favourite meal hand-delivered to their doorstep? Everybody likes food, but everybody LOVES free, surprise food! So, what better way to express how much you care about them? 


Image Courtesy - Giphy


House-Hunt With Them 

In the course of any successful relationship, living together is a possibility both the parties usually entertain and get excited about! So just because circumstances decided to put some geographical distance between the two of you, it does not mean you have to abandon that sweet prospect! Browse through dream houses, share those with your partner and plan everything from the colour of the curtains to the size of the bed, together! You don't even need to be realistic, just dreaming together of a beautiful future together in a stunning house will suffice!


Image Courtesy - Giphy


Begin A Count-Down!

As time passes and you two continue to navigate your way on the road of long-distance, the time for a reunion will be on the horizon before you know it! So, why not start a count-down to the day you will finally see each other in person again? Start maintaining a calendar together, and make it a point to cross off each day together as the wait agonizingly slowly comes to a stop, and you find yourself in your partner's arms! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy



Surprise Visit! 

Saving the most potent for the last, an act of long-distance love that can melt the coldest of hearts is a surprise visit! So start saving for those plane tickets, and fly down to present them with the ultimate gift, you live in flesh! A word of advice? Be sure to figure out your partner's schedule before you plan to visit them. You don't want your act of love to become a grave inconvenience in your significant other's life, especially if they have something crucial going on! 


Image Courtesy - Giphy

So with that, we wrap up this guide to keeping the spark alive in a long-distance relationship. An ounce of effort, a generous helping of understanding and oodles of affection and care, together create the recipe for a successful long-distance relationship! Keep hanging in there, and you will be next to your love before you know it! 


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